Don’t ask me

Don’t ask me why I want to die
I’ll start laughing and ask you to join me for coffee
But you don’t want to go
You rather not listen.
Don’t ask me why I lay down in the rain
To hide my tear stained face
When you want to say “it’s not all bad”
Just in case
You want to ask me
Be ready for a darkened door
Opening to an abyss
Of monsters and no oxygen
Don’t ask me why I want to die
If you’re not willing to listen
On this dark and empty ride
Where depression has no rules
And anxiety jumps off every roof
Where I’m mentally grabbing at my chest
But have a smile running my lips
Do not tell me it’s not all bad
Because I already know
I’ve held on this long on that note
Do not tell me of better days
I have reached them
I have names
It’s not the issue
No
It’s when the night comes
And the demons roam
When everyone is asleep
And no one to speak
Is when it’s bad
And when I’m alone
Do not ask me why I want to die
I’ll start laughing until I cry.
Want a coffee?
If only you’ll listen.